Ally Tiscareno

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my mom told me that in high school she used to get boyfriends at the beginning of February so they had enough time to get her a valentines day gift and then break up with them the day after and just keep the gift and one day she told her parents about it and they made her keep her boyfriend at least until the end of February and so she did and that boy is now my dad

(via precious-in-pearls)


How to know which boy you like:

1. Get very drunk

2. You will cry about the boy you like

(via overfierce)


i wonder how many people i’m in the “i’d be down if you asked” zone with

(via bastille)


how your mom looks at you during parent teacher conferences 


(via bastille)


'do it for the vine'


(via oknope)


Dad, can you help me with my math homework? “Sure. 69, 420, and 666. Those are the only numbers you need in life. Never forget that, son.”

(via neptunain)